What do you call a man with a sack of money running from a bank? A rich man.

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person 1 - what's big, green and ugly? person 2 - don't know. what's big, green and ugly? person 1 - nothing is

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

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Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

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Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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Jesus

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Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

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Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

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What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

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What do you get when you cross an l with a line? A t.

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What says "Mooo"? A goat with an identity crisis.

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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what does a gorilla do when it sleeps. it snores.

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What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your a Jew, I don't like you.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

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Knock Knock. No one answered, as the person of residence was not home.

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A nun, a jew, and a KKK member are all stuck together in a lifeboat. A large wave overturns the boat and they all drown.

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You're on fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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