How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your a Jew, I don't like you.

A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating on the water? Dead.

Gale swallows.

Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

2+2= 478

Christians

Why was the little boy sad? He tried to dry off his puppy in the oven.

Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

Why did the chicken cross the road? Suisidal

What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

Once there was two fish in a tank, and one said "how do you drive this thing?".

What's round and red? A round and red solid.

What a wonderfuuuul wooorld: Would this not be a wonderful world if we instead of killing innocent children, just gRaped them hard and painfully in every damn hole and let them go home? Ad: Consider the life of the poor children, Just 0rape them hard!... For love! Awww... Moral: What moral You see any moral here? XD No Not Nerometal, I am that "leader of the Neronist... whatever" Yes, that is who I am. Real moral: "Seriously who is gonna listen to some kid who is just (severely) butthurt anyway huh? Cut their tongues off! Just do not kill them... For a wonderful world..." <3 (Not a heart lol)

What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

How did the cat die? I just it nine times

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Want to hear a joke about Potassium? So do I.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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