What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS. AIDS is worse.

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What’s brown, sticky and smells like poo? Shit!!

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What happens when some one breaks apart your little brother's lego tower? You have a screaming little brother and a bunch of legos all over the floor.

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A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 75% water. I can walk on babies. I am... In jail.

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How Long is a Chinese name.

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Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

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So an asian man gets into a car... and drives home on the highway driving at the approximate speed of the designated speed limit while exhibiting safe driving maneuvers. He arrives home to his wife and kids and sits down for a nice dinner while having a engaging conversation about the political future of the United States and his favorite football team.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

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Q: What's the Difference between Judaism and Catholicism? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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Why was the black guy good at basketball? He practiced hard everyday.

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Know what's worse than being publicly embarrassed in front of your crush? Jeffrey dahmer

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What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

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a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

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why doesnt cornelia say anything? she didnt answer

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You might be redneck if you are... Indian

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I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Amblyopsidae, or blindfish, commonly found in caves where they are well adapted to life in the dark.

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Why was the Catholic priest incarcerated? 2 counts of child pornography and 3 counts of sexual abuse with a minor. Since he is now released, he's working as a janitor of an elementary school.

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why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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