2+2= 478

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

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Me: Knock Knock! You: Door's Open!

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This guys walks in a forest and meets a bear. So he says : - Yo yo, whattup, bear ? And the bear says "ROAR!" Because he's a bear.

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

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Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

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What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

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19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens are raised on farms, which are away from society. They are taken care of in pens, and have no way of escaping. Therefore it couldn't have crossed any roads.

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What do you call a man who has reached the highest level of prestige in all Call of Duty games? A Virgin

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Why was the mexican ugly? -UR MOM!

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Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

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What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

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What says "Mooo"? A goat with an identity crisis.

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What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

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Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

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What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

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what is the difference of a duck..... it neither wears tie.....

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What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

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What's pink and smells like chicken? A pink hair band, I was lying about the chicken part.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They brutally whipped and tortured her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops