what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

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A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

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if a black man, a Chinese man, and an Indian were about to jump off the Eiffel tower, who would hit the ground first? who cares?

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Knock knock whose there? i have a warrant, i excpect you to come out peacefully with you hands behind you back

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was kidding about the wheels.

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It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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Hey guess what? Nevermind.

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After a long day on the movie set, Lindsay Lohan decides to go out to a bar. She gets really drunk and high on drugs and some guy takes her back to her trailer and stuffs her muffin.

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A bass player walks past a bar. What? It could happen.

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods They both have beards... EXCEPT FOR TIGER WOODS.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? 10 because they're so darn stupid!

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What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

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Q: What happened to Michael Jackson yesterday? A: Nothing.

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What is pink and smells like green paint? Pink paint

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What do you call a group of homosexuals placing an order at McDonalds? Gay

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What do you call two Ethiopians standing side-by-side? Friends

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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Gay jokes are a real pain in the butt.

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equality for women

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A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

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Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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