I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

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Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

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What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

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What's the difference between a duck?

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A guy walks into a bar. He then comes home at 4 a.m. to beat his wife.

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knock knock whos there ? Jordan Jordan who ? Jordan Walters

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what did the little boy see when he walked into his parents bed room a bed

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How many jews can get in a Volvo? 5.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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what is not funny? This joke.

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So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

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Knock Knock! Come in.

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Miscarriages.

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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your going to die

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

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How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

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Why did the boy cry? because his tear-ducts were agitated by an emotional reaction due to jokes that were ironically hilarious because of how bland and usual the punchlines were

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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(in a retarted voice) i want to go to disneyland

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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roses are red violets are blue i had sex with your dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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