If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

a man walks into a bar he is an alcohol and it's ruining his family

To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

What did the Spanish immigrant say? Olah.

What did it say in the end of the book? The End.

What rhymes with you? You.

That joke was so funny that I fell off my dinosaur. Then afterwards had to be put in a rehabilitation center because I am schizophrenic and dinosaurs are extinct.

A bass player walks past a bar. What? It could happen.

What did the young girl get for Christmas? Violently raped and murdered by her abusive father.

Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

why did the chicken cross the road ??? why would you care??

My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

What's the difference between a white man and a black man? Nothing. They are both created in God's image and likeness so get your mind outta the gutter!

A blonde walks into a library. "PLEASE CAN I HAVE A CHEESEBURGER?!" he shouts at the top of his lungs. "Sir, this is a library," the librarian says. "Oh, sorry," he whispers and goes to McDonald's Two years of the routine and he dies of of heart failure and has diabetes.

How do you have sex with the blue waffle? stick your penis inside

42

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...