Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

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Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

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I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

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You.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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Why did Charlie fall? He got shot 24 times in the chest.

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What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

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what is darker than black?... YOU

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Want to hear a joke? Me to...

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The brunette and the redhead escape, but the blonde is captured. Why? Because she had a prosthetic leg sustained from a previous injury, and thus couldn't run very fast.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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how do you stop a baby crying hit it with a brick.

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The meme walks out of the bar.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Cadillac? A Cadillac is a car, and a dead baby is a morose and disgusting topic of internet humor.

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whats black. an african american person

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A man walks into a bar and the the llama next store sprouted wings and flew Then a potato says hi to a iPod but unfortunatly the iPod can't talk. Meanwhile hello kitty and ducks wage a nuclear war and the rise of ostriches Started. The a giant cucumber started falling of mt. Everest and killed many Flying platipuses were saved. Then aliens started invading and the world ended.

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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lebron

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops