How fast is the speed of sex? 70 mph, minimum 40 mph

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I just lost the game where if you think about the game then you lose the game. so did you.

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What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

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A man walked into a bar and said ow.

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What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

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equality for women

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what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

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The meme walks out of the bar.

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What did St. Mary Magdalene tell Pontius Pilate during the crucifixion of Christ? All this chaos is making me CROSS-eyed!

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What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

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why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

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The NBA lockout

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Why did the hipster hate black people? Because he was racist.

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A BABY seal walks into a club

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Obama 2012

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What kind of cheese is not you cheese? Not your cheese.

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why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

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Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

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Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

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What did the FBI agent say to the CIA agent. We're both agents

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Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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