A man walks into a bar... and watches the Monday Night Football game with his pals.

Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

what did the mexican firefighter name his two sons. Ryan and Mike.......

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

What is the most attractive part of a woman's body? The part where she doesn't have a penis. I know, I know, the no-penis thing looks weird and strange, but hear me out. I think it's kind of cute and quirky. Like, oops, there's something that's supposed to be there, but isn't.

Why was the chicken mad? Because he was sick of everyone questioning him even when he crossed the road.

womens sports...

lebron

roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

what was the dinosaur after it got out of the pool? wet

What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

Wumbo

what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

How do you tell if someone is a Jew? Ask them politely.

You.

Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

How did the cat die? I just it nine times

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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