Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

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what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

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John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

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What's the difference between black people and white people? Their skin color.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

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Once there was two fish in a tank, and one said "how do you drive this thing?".

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what do you call a homosexual kid? A Kerich

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

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What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

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Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

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What is colourful and explodes in the air. I don't know but it sounds cool!

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What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

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Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your a Jew, I don't like you.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

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A nun, a jew, and a KKK member are all stuck together in a lifeboat. A large wave overturns the boat and they all drown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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