What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

What's brown and sticky? a stick.

Sarah Palin

roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

what was the dinosaur after it got out of the pool? wet

Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

How do wake up Lady Gaga You Poker her face

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

Jesus

What's white and sticky? A white stick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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