what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

What did Justin Bieber get for Christmas? An iPod Touch and a few nice sweaters.

What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common? They are sports, except the Holocaust.

how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

Why did i write this joke knowing i wont get published? I don't know.

A Asian man with a boner runs and hits the wall... He beaks his nose.

What's white and sticky? A white stick.

There once was an Asian kid who got a B+ in Math. He was later yelled at and beat by his parents.

How do wake up Lady Gaga You Poker her face

There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have a gun BANG!

your momma's so stupid she shot herself

Why dont you ever see any black mermaids? Mermaids dont exist.

Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

A Woman out of the kitchen

Why didn't Helen Keller have headphones? Because they weren't invented

What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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