Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

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The pope and three young boys get into a cab. The pope tells the driver to take the boys home.

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A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

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whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

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Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

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The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

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What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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Why wouldnt NASA send a blackman into space without a space suit? Because space is a vacuum there is no air no atmosphere the tempurature is almost zero kelvin so if you ever go out int space please dont take off your helmet out there because you would freeze to death almost instantaniously.

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Knock Knock "Who's There?" *No answer* The man proceeds to go on with his life

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There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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As a teen girl was walking through the perfume shop, she picked up one called, "Swirly Paradise." She sprayed it on her and sniffed the sweet scent. Suddenly, the world spun around and she suddenly woke up inside an empty bra. A mouse sniffed her and ate her alive.

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How fast is the speed of sex? 70 mph, minimum 40 mph

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

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A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

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Q: What did the mime say to the crowd gathered at the crime scene? A:

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Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

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A nun, a jew, and a KKK member are all stuck together in a lifeboat. A large wave overturns the boat and they all drown.

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What happened to the blonde that died her hair brown? Her hair turned brown.

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What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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