Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

I've got a boner

Three nuns accidentally walked in to a bar and so they immediately went out.

A man walks into a bar He says ouch

What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

A man walked into a bar and said ow.

If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

poop.

how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the world series? No Cubs!

you know what they say... hydrate or die

How can you kill a blonde? Hack her to bits.

A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common? They are sports, except the Holocaust.

Yo mama so stupid she liked this joke

What's funnier than House? Family Guy.

Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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