Why was Jenny walking home alone from school? Because three years ago her parents were murdered brutally by a drug dealer and social services haven't yet realised that Jenny is still living in the empty house.

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Dylan Eichas

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbor.

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Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

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How could they tell Michael Jackson was dead? He showed no vital signs.

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Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

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Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

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Oh look, I've found my knife

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whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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Your mom is so...wonderful.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

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why did aodhan not play BO2? Aodhan has Cerebral palsy.

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Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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Knock knock Who's there? Labrinth Come in

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Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

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What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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What's black and not working? An old, broken piano.

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You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops