What has four wheels and can fly? A flying car What else has four wheels and can fly? Another flying car

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What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

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Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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A man walked into a bar. "Ouch"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

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A barrel of monkeys is only a barrel of laughs if they're alive and telling jokes.

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Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

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What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

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What did the young girl get for Christmas? Violently raped and murdered by her abusive father.

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What is colourful and explodes in the air. I don't know but it sounds cool!

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Roses are der, Violets are lube, I am dyslexic.

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Q:What's the difference between a pinata and a baby? A: One I hang from a tree and beat to death and the other one is a pinata..

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What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

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Why does a black man break into a car? Because he had closed the windows and locked his keys inside.

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I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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