Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

guy 1... "do you no any funny jokes?" guy2 ..."no" guy1 ..."same"

make me a sandwich!

A man is sitting on a bench in a park crying a man walking by asks why he's crying, and the man answers that he has no idea why he's crying

Knock knock Who's There Doctor Doctor Who? Wrong, it's Dr. Doozer, you have AIDS

Q. What's the difference between dead babies and celebrities? A. Nobody likes celebrities.

What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

What happened when a boy threw a ball at the wall? It hit him in the face

What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

Why did Windows crash ? F*ck Windows, that's why.

hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

Do you know the joke about the two guys who went to Paris ? Me neither.

What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

Oxygen and magnesium are going out OMG Think science the you might get it If not O oxygen mg magnesium

Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

A seal walks into a club...

Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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