Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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Q: What do you call a pakistani that practices medice? A: Doctor

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What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

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i said wut wut in the butt!

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravitational force acted upon the monkey who was not holding on to any branch.

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A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

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???????????? WTF?

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Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

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Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Weiner? A: You can never make "fetch" happen.

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What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

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What did Justin Bieber get for Christmas? An iPod Touch and a few nice sweaters.

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What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

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A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

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why did the puppy have a sticky tongue? because its owner was abusive and made the puppy lick peanut butter from his balls

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A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

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make me a sandwich!

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whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

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Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

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A muslim checks in at an airport and gets on a plane. He reads a book about knitting, gets off the plane at France and goes back to his job as a librarian.

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What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

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What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin boys? Thomas and David after his father and grandfather.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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