Dylan Eichas

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A man walked into a bar. "Ouch"

thumb_up thumb_down +7

this site is funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A seal walks into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down -1

There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why do holocasut jokes make us laugh? i dont know you tell me

thumb_up thumb_down -39

I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

A blonde goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "That is a worrying symptom," says the doctor, who immediately recommends the woman for a thorough psychiatric assessment.

thumb_up thumb_down -101

What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The spelling errors on anti-jokes.com

thumb_up thumb_down -101

What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

thumb_up thumb_down +134

whats annoying and black? black people

thumb_up thumb_down +122

what's blue and white and red all over? -nothing the "red all over" part implies a contradiction to blue and white.

thumb_up thumb_down +96

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down +78

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How many jews can get in a Volvo? 5.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many dead babies can you fit in a trash can? 12- 18 (depending on size) I know this because i use to work at a abortion clinic

thumb_up thumb_down -22

3 men find a genie lamp on the side of a road, The genie grants them each a wish as they surely deserve. The first man asks for a jet and the genie glady grants him this and the man starts to fly away. The second man says to make a wall around asia and the genie complies. The third man thinks for a minute and finally says fill it with water and as a genie the genie cannot refuse. They all drowned seeing how the jet had no fuel. The genie goes back to sleep and is picked up by an alien 5,000 years in the future, the Earth is destroyed in 7012(as if we didnt already destroy it). The genie survives and currently resides on uranus.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops