penis

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Man: You know what sucks? Other man: What? Man: Diarrhea... Know what's worse? Other man: No, what? Man: The smell.

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Why didn't Clair get up all day? She died in her sleep.

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A man walks into a bar, and is brutally slaughtered by eight drunk customers.

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A woman walks into a bar and asks for a duck. The bartender is confused, assumes the women has some sort of mental problem, and treats her nicely, as his sister suffers from Down's Syndrome.

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What do you call a plane in shining armor? A knight flight.

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Why didn't the cat have any legs? Because it was a snake

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Why was Jessica sad? She had just recently run over a few newborn puppies with her car.

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You know what happens when there's an awkward silence... Everyone feels a little bit uncomfortable for a brief moment in time.

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Why does Gandalf have special powers? Because Dumbledore died.

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A person who doesn't know hungarian is trying to read the next sentence. Sajnos nem érti, mivel nem tud magyarul.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Whats black, dead, and hangs from a tree in my backyard? Your Mom

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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What's faster a hungry black guy or a car? A car

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What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Drumset.

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What happens when a black guy roles over a speed-bump? I don't know. I have never tried it

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A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

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Andy: Mom, I wish I was a dinosaur. Mom: Aw, that's cute! Why? Andy: Because dinosaurs do not suffer from terminal pancreatic cancer.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter, he won't come.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was already in the oven.

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reggin... its N I GG E R backwards

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One dog says to the other dog "Nice day, isn't it?" The other dog says "You can talk!?"

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Man: Why do you wear your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Woman: Oh, wow, thanks for pointing that out. Silly me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops