Always bring food to the zoo. It's not the animals who placed the signs not to feed them.

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A 55-year-old white man's car is broken, so he decides to take a bus to work that morning. His bus arrives and he gets on. Then he notices the driver's a woman. He pays for his ticket, takes a seat by the window and in about an hour he gets to his office.

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There's an American, an African, and a Chinese walking down the street. Because the bar is down there.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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What did the guy who had cancer get for Christmas? Death.

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Why did the man walk into the bar? He wast thirsty.

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What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

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You wanna hear an inside joke? That was one of them.

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If at first you don't succeed.... maybe skydiving isn't for you...

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Whut r bacer dew? Eh muphin

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

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Whats the difference between and anti joke and a joke? There two different things.

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Q: What do you call a black person that flies planes? A: A pilot you racist

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Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

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Two blondes are sitting in a car. They took a drive and later enjoyed turkey sandwiches at the local eatery.

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Why did the girl fall off the couch? She had a seizure.

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What happened to the blind man who went skydiving? Nothing but the dog was unlucky.The dog kept squirming and he thought he hadnt gone down the cliff yet and said "ok fine dont come with me!".The dog didnt survive. :'(

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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A sheep goes up to to a horse and asks "Does you speak sheep?".The horse replies ''Neigh''.

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What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

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What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

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Why did the blonde driver crossed the red light? Because she has a good notion of physics and realized that the truck that was behind her was too fast to stop in time and if she braked there could have been an accident.

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what did one farmer say to the other farmer we are farmers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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