A duck walks into a doctor's office, and says 'Quack!' The doctor is offended and resigns.

An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

Michael J. Fox asked me if I wanted my drink shaken or stirred, did I really have a choice?

whats brown, lying in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? a girl scout that got hit by a truck

Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because he did

Why did the beach ball pop? Because it stepped on a sharp chocolate chip cookie!

Two guys walk in a bar, and they die.

haha ur single hahahahahhahahahhahaahahhaahaha i am 2

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

What do you tell a black man walking down the street with a suspicious look to him. Hey, how's it going?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cactus cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens butt.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

how long does it take for a black woman to shit? a couple of minutes.

The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

Yo mama's so fat that I make Yo Mama jokes about her!!

Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding your babies head in a microwave

A man walks into a bar, he is immediately rushed to the emergency room

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

what did the teacher say to the kid? you failed the kid cried.

LIKE THIS!

Why did the black man fall off the bicycle? He was shot at close range by one of a gang of young white males. This horrific violence was most likely fueled by racial prejudice. Our thoughts go out to the young man's family and friends.

How do you make a black man cry? A: Kill his whole family.

Why were the babies used for target practice? Hitler demanded the Nazis to do so.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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