What the difference between a black man and a pizza? A black man is capable of feeding a family. A pizza is capable of feeding an American.

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Why couldn't the boy see? He was dead

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Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

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A man walks in to a bar. He was hospitalized and died later that day.

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What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

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How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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Q:I finished my Homework A:thats what she said

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What's red, blue, green, yellow, pink, purple, orange, teal, light green, brown, black and white? Colours, except for black and white, for they are the absence and amalgam of all colours, respectively.

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i did not type this on 12/23/11 at 8:49:47

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what did one farmer say to the other farmer we are farmers

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A Jew and a Nazi have dinner together...... they both immensely enjoyed the wine.

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Why did girl cry? Because she recently saw the messy demise of her parent's marriage.

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What's worst than getting glass stuck in your foot? Rubbing lotion on a fork.

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how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

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What has 4 legs and goes "meow." A cat. Dang! You already heard it.

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So there's this boy who really love clowns. His room is adorned with circus and clown posters and his one dream is to go to a circus and see a clown. One day he sees an ad in the newspaper for a circus that was headed toward his town. He begged and pleaded to his parents to let him go, and when they finally agreed he was ecstatic. The boy was in awe of all the things that the circus held, elephants, lions, tightrope walkers and trapeze artists, but there was nothing he was more excited for then the main show with the clowns. He took a seat and out came the clown on a unicycle. The boy was having the time of his life, when the clown suddenly called for someone from the audience. The boy immediately ran to the center of the stage. The clown asked the boy "Are you a horse's head?" then held the mic to the boy. "No," he replied. "Are you a horse's mouth?" "No." "Then you must be a horse's BUTT!" The crowd erupted in laughter and the boy was mortified. He ran out of the circus tent and vowed never to return. He grew up with a hatred for clowns and even had to see multiple therapists. 30 years passed and the boy was now a man. The man looked in his morning paper, only to see that a circus was in town. He decided he would visit one last time. There it was, the elephants and tightrope walkers. And then he saw it, the same clown from 30 years ago in the same show. He walked up and the clown asked the same questions. "Are you a horse's head?" "No." "Are you a horse's mouth?" "No." "Then you must be a horse's BUTT!" Then man the took the microphone from the clown and said, "Screw you clown."

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Why can't blondes change a lightbulb? Because they're women

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What's worse than dying? Living in Africa

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Drunk guy... Hey i just maybe And this is number But here's my crazy So call me met you

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You're mama's so ugly, she will most-likely never meet a compatible mate and die alone.

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How's a raven like a writing desk. you really are alice.

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What do you call thousands of people starving all across the globe? Not my problem.

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how do you kill a bear. -you shoot it.

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A: How do you make a fire with two sticks? B: Ask your mother, we did it last night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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