Why was the baby going so fast? It was tied to a bus.

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Are women better than men? Dont know but what we do know is they swing at bigger balls (softballs), shoot from lower basketball nets, do pushups from their knees. Shall I go on?

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What do you call a with no arms and no legs floating in the water? About to drown.

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What does Rubens Barrichelo does with his F1 championship trophies? He never got one.

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if you are what you eat then you're a hamburger

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

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Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

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Take My Wife- Because as it stands, I'm having frequent, toe-curling, unprotected sex with your wife. And that just doesnt seem fair.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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An Irishman walked into a pub and ordered a pint. He had planned to just have one but ended up having two since he'd had a rough day at work. His wife was slightly annoyed that he came home smelling of beer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

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Yo Momma's so fat she has Type 1 Diabetes.

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Why can't black people swim? Because most African American individuals grow up in inner urban cities where they have little or no access to swimming facilities.

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

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What did John F. Kennedy say to Kurt Cobain? Nothing. They never met.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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What's the longest, hardest thing on a black man? His femur.

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OneBigAssMistakeAmerica

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Your momma's so fat when she walks into a restaurant she orders salad.

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-Is Michael Jackson dead? - HELL YEAH HE'S DEAD!!

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Yo momma so fat she was baptized in a church, because she wasn't as fat as she is currently.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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