Your moma's so fat, she's got type 2 diabetes

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What happened to the blind man who went skydiving? Nothing but the dog was unlucky.The dog kept squirming and he thought he hadnt gone down the cliff yet and said "ok fine dont come with me!".The dog didnt survive. :'(

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what did the blind santa say to the jewish child jewish people don't believe in santa...awkward.

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What's worse than dying? Living in Africa

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How you learn to juggle? You ask someone for their balls.

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Got milk? No.

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Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

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How do you know when Taylor Swift is dead? When you don't hear Boyfriend songs anymore

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Want to hear a funny joke? Sure. Women's Rights. That's not even a joke. You don't get it. It's not even a sentence.

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What do you call a black man and a white woman who are married? A married couple

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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why did Stevie Wonder run a stop sign? he was changing his CD's and missed it.

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Knock Know Who's there Interrupting ghost Interu--BOO!!! Ha HA!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure.

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A man ingested a hamburger. It proved fatal due to a tomato allergy.

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Did you hear the one about the Gay Irish Politician who was running for President?! He withdrew his candidacy.

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Knock Knock. "Who's there?" The cops.

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Why did the man walk into the bar? He wast thirsty.

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How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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how long does it take for a black woman to shit? a couple of minutes.

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a dog walk into a landmine, he exploded.

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A black walks into a bar Because it is still around the time of segregation, they don't serve colored people

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why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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