Justin Bieber.

Why did Billy cry? He had Pubic Lice

Why did the car stop? There was a fridge in the road

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had just escaped from the slaughterhouse and ran for its life.

My friend told me to break a leg before the show. I disobeyed him and injured no one. It's just a figure of speech.

A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replied, "That's probably because you're schizophrenic."

What do you call a black man and a white woman who are married? A married couple

Womens rights

A baby seal walks into a club...

Why did the mouse cross the road, and then go down it? It tried to get cheese on the other side, but got hit by a SUV and was stuck to the wheels. The rat on the wheel goes "Squish, Scratch,, Mush........

Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one. Lady Gaga has a small one. Madonna doesn't have one. What is it? A last name.

A man enters a bar, and says: "It is impossible to drown in an elevator" This is incorrect.

Three a man is trapped on a desert island and a genie offers to grant him one wish. The man accepts the existence of the genie and then wishes for unlimited wishes for the rest of his life. The man takes over the world.

Why did the beach ball pop? Because it stepped on a sharp chocolate chip cookie!

What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber and One Direction? A bunch of gay pop stars.

How do you torture Helen Keller? Waterboarding.

Are women better than men? Dont know but what we do know is they swing at bigger balls (softballs), shoot from lower basketball nets, do pushups from their knees. Shall I go on?

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

Knock knock. It's me, the ratboy genius.

you want to hear a joke? the goverment.

Knock Knock Who's There? God God who.....wait REALLY? No Dave, this is a hallucination, and your peeing right now.

What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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