How is nothing something if it is nothing?...

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What's green and has wheels? Dave Matthew's Band

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

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Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

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How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

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why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

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Why was the little Jewish girl sad? Because neo-Nazis killed her family.

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How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

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What's big, wet and hairy? Not what you think it is.

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

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A man walks into a McDonald's and proceeds to buy a burger, unfortunately a man was robbing the fast food restaurant, what did the man do. Buy a burger

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How many dead children can you fit in a garbage can? Give me a knife and i will find out

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Rich people gave money to charity Charity gave money to the homeless The homeless spent the money on drugs

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What will Postman Pat be called after he retires? Pat.

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What happens when you put a cat in an oven? Don't, because it will die.

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why did the lion get lost? because the jungle is massive.

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What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

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How do you make a man sad? By drowning him in a Bede.

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What do you call a with no arms and no legs floating in the water? About to drown.

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So three Mexicans, a black man, and 2 white men enter a room. They promptly sever their penises and jump out the window because they are all members of a strange cult.

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No, I still have to make sense of some facts bits and pieces here, and thinking is pretty much the only thing I can do at this moment, so why would my doppelganger wannabe call me from her mothers place?

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What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops