Why do you give a blond a gun You dont

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A theif walks into a blonde ladies apartment. The theif takes all of her valuable belongings, leaving her life in shambles.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting rape.d by a giant scorpion.

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ey can i pick your scabs plzz

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What happened when a myriad people decided to partake in a large party while staying in a small room? They managed to make a compromise. The party got split into two groups: 50% of the original total in each casual confinement. In the end, everybody had a great time and nobody got hurt.

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What did the convicted necrophiliac pedophile do when he found a dead baby? He reported it to the authorities because despite his past habits and behaviour, and after years of rehabilitation he became a responsible and considerate citizen

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Your momma's so fat when she walks into a restaurant she orders salad.

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Whats plastic and phonie a phone

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Why did the teenager write a joke on here? Because after hours of surfing this website and casually laughing at herself she realized she had no life and the only way to feel happy with her self would be submitting her own to here.

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The Paralympics! Even if you win, you're still retarded!

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Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

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what is worse than a pile of dead babies? the one on the bottom trying to eat its way out of a pile of babies that have been poisoned.

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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Your mom is so ugly, she buys groceries at the grocery store.

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Why did the boy punch his teacher? Muscle spasms.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Sure. Women's Rights. That's not even a joke. You don't get it. It's not even a sentence.

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What happened when an atheist burned down the home of a priest? He was arrested, charged with arson and sentenced to 5 years in prison.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Lemons Lemons who? The fruit

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Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the fourth panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. -BG_Shank_A

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She had previously been in a car accident, in which all of her close family died and she was the only survivor. Since both her arms were stuck in between crushed components of the car, they had to be amputated on the spot. She was testing out the prosthetic arms she had been given when they failed, causing her to get a concussion, and putting her in a coma for the rest of her life.

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So a black man, an Italian, a Mexican, an Irishman, a Chinese man, and a Jew walk into a bar. They go their separate ways and never see each other again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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