What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

thumb_up thumb_down +138

I hate it when i don't forward an email and then i die the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down +138

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Your mama is so fat that when she walks her legs rub against each other

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why is the dinosaur yellow? He's not.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q:Why did Billy drop his ice cream? A:He was hit by a truck. Q:Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was hit by Billy. Q:Why did the clown's friend fall off the swing? A:He had no arms. Q:Why did the chicken cross the road? A:To get to Billy's ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges don't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why couldn't the guy find his pants? Because his girlfriend stole them last night

thumb_up thumb_down +10

if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Let's make like your mother and walk out on your family during pre-adolescence.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

thumb_up thumb_down -18

???????????? WTF?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man took his son out to play catch. The boy didn't even try to catch the ball. After that the man took his son to the amusement park to have fun. The boy didn't even try to have fun. Then the man took his son to the burger place nearby. Once again the son didn't even touch his food. Finally the man lost his temper and beat his seemingly ungrateful son and cried over the fact that his son was mentally retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Roses are red Violets are blue Last night I came home to find my entire family murdered....

thumb_up thumb_down -34

why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Whats gay and has wheels? Alex Egbert, I lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

Por que não passa Globo Esporte na Etiópia? Porque a Rede Globo não tem afiliadas por lá.

thumb_up thumb_down -106

Why did the car stop? There was a fridge in the road

thumb_up thumb_down +127

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops