Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

A man walks into a bar and has a wonderful time drinking with his friends, arrives home at a reasonable time and goes to bed.

Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

the other day i saw a mouse run across my floor. i said "okay" and proceeded with my life

Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

did you know that Hellen Keller had a tree house? "no" she didn't know either.

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

One day, I was looking at my brand new wooden table, and I thought, "wow, that is a very nice brand new wooden table." And then my dog peed on it. I killed the dog.

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trick Question. Baby's aren't smart enough comprehend changing light bulbs

Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm color blind.

What is the main similarity of Darth Vader and Michael Jackson? They are both dead fathers.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

Q: What was Jerry Sandusky's defensive philosophy at Penn State? A: Get penetration and always cover the Tight End.

How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

1: Why did the chicken cross the road? 2: The chicken has a right to privacy, stop questioning what she does

Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...