What happened to the guy that fell off the building? He hit the ground

Whats worse than breaking your pencil? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

You

Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

How come the black man couldn't be seen on film? He could be seen on film, he's not a vampire.

How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Shes been dead for some time now.

what did the man say to the other man? hi

Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

69

Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

What did the alien discuss with the other alien? Something we discussed.

What is worse than burning your toast? - Obama

There's an American, an African, and a Chinese walking down the street. Because the bar is down there.

Q:Why did Billy drop his ice cream? A:He was hit by a truck. Q:Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was hit by Billy. Q:Why did the clown's friend fall off the swing? A:He had no arms. Q:Why did the chicken cross the road? A:To get to Billy's ice cream.

Are you a tree? No.

There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

Q. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? A. A bird can fly, but a fly can't.

How can you tell when a lawyer is lying? In most people who lie eyebrows may raise, eyes may widen and gaze may alter, anal sphincter usually tightens, breathing often quickens marginally, external body temperature alters and sweat (and therefore skin electrical conductivity) increases.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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