What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the poor thing is so confused and is seeking a near by farm.

There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

How are you this morning?

You might be a redneck if you are an individual a part of a low social caste in a predominately rural area such as the southern part of the United States or a mountainous area such as the Appalachians or Ozarks who may or may not partake in stereotypical activities such as hunting, fishing or farming And who also lives in possibly degraded living conditions.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

Why did the teenager write a joke on here? Because after hours of surfing this website and casually laughing at herself she realized she had no life and the only way to feel happy with her self would be submitting her own to here.

Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

Roses are red Violets are blue Last night I came home to find my entire family murdered....

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Having a refrigerator fall on you

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had just escaped from the slaughterhouse and ran for its life.

How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

Want to hear a funny joke? Sure. Women's Rights. That's not even a joke. You don't get it. It's not even a sentence.

"Ask me if I'm a banana." "Are you a banana?" "No."

A theif walks into a blonde ladies apartment. The theif takes all of her valuable belongings, leaving her life in shambles.

Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

why was the boy sad? his friend got hit by a bus.

Knock knock Who's there? The police Ahh shit

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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