What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

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Yo mama so fat she sells shade. Yo mama so fat she needs cheat codes for wii fit. Yo mama so fat she in call of duty when a player kills her they get a 5 person kill streak. Yo mama so fat that she is fat. :)

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

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What is worse than burning your toast? - Obama

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whats worse than Brussels sprouts brussels sprouts that has petite vegetation, lack of sun causing mold and placed in a septic tank.

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What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

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What happened to the guy that fell off the building? He hit the ground

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When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

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why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

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Why don't white people do the right thing? Because we suck

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How many people can you fit in an oven? A: I Don't know ask a holocaust survivor.

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Well, honestly I don't know how I feel about meeting you yet, or chatting with you, I never believed I would get to speak, or even less meet "The Nero", I mean as far as I know, nobody that ever worked alongside you ever has... ...By the way, the thing with the metal arm, well I don't have both arms, so yeah, story of my life. I am "Eliza" here too, its not coding, its just me sharing my real part of my life with our followers, and well, they do not make much sense out of it, but I get to share the tale about how Nero saved me, if not in person.

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Why did the car slam its brakes on? There was a infant under the bonnet.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ostrich. Ostrich who? No no I don't have a formal name, I'm just telling you I'm an ostrich.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he could beat the oncoming car.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender

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What do you get when you cross a blond with a plank of wood? A blond with a plank of wood on her head.

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

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170

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when I shaved this morning....... hairs went down the sink

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5

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What did George W. Bush say to his wife when he got home? I'm home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops