How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

So these two gay guys walk backwards into a bar.

Why did the Turkey cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

One day, I was looking at my brand new wooden table, and I thought, "wow, that is a very nice brand new wooden table." And then my dog peed on it. I killed the dog.

1: Why did the chicken cross the road? 2: The chicken has a right to privacy, stop questioning what she does

20

Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

ey can i pick your scabs plzz

I asked my Grandma if she ever tried 69. And she said, “No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the sailors I could screw in one night.”

Knock knock. Who's there? Michael Jackson.

Why couldn't the guy find his pants? Because his girlfriend stole them last night

Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

If you have a green ball in your left hand and a green ball your right hand, what do you have? Kermit the Frog's undivided attention

what is worse than a pile of dead babies? the one on the bottom trying to eat its way out of a pile of babies that have been poisoned.

Hey you want to here a joke? I can't think of one

What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

Why did the bartender tell the black man to "Get Out"? It was 4 a.m and the bar closed at 3:30 a.m an honest mistake by the man.

How is it you become the true badass you say? Its a very complicated process that takes decades of training, and many failed attempts on before you become the one, true badass on the entire planet. Once you had done it. People will love you forever, there would be parades, parties, celebrations, even a holiday, just for you and you alone. Too bad I'll never tell you.

What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

What do you get when you put a dog in a cage. Cantaloupes

What's big, wet and hairy? Not what you think it is.

Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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