how many jews can you fit in an oven? -well zero because the conventional oven cannot fit a full sized human

A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. They discuss their differences over a pint of beer and leave with a greater understanding of each other's faiths.

what did the man say to the other man? hi

So you there Red?

Why didn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it made him mean.

why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She had previously been in a car accident, in which all of her close family died and she was the only survivor. Since both her arms were stuck in between crushed components of the car, they had to be amputated on the spot. She was testing out the prosthetic arms she had been given when they failed, causing her to get a concussion, and putting her in a coma for the rest of her life.

Want to hear a joke? I'm sorry.

How are you this morning?

What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

Why did the policeman arrest the black man? He had commited a crime and murdered somebody.

So a black man, an Italian, a Mexican, an Irishman, a Chinese man, and a Jew walk into a bar. They go their separate ways and never see each other again.

Husband: Shut up, there is now playing for Real Madrid Woman: So what? come help me clean. Husband:after the game,now shut up. Woman:Everyone knows Barcelona better... Police: So you're saying your wife fell on the knife alone?

What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

when I shaved this morning....... hairs went down the sink

Why was the baby going so fast? It was tied to a bus.

How can you tell when a lawyer is lying? In most people who lie eyebrows may raise, eyes may widen and gaze may alter, anal sphincter usually tightens, breathing often quickens marginally, external body temperature alters and sweat (and therefore skin electrical conductivity) increases.

What's brown and sticky? a stick

Why is the kid over-weighted? Because he had to many calories in his diegestive system and he couldn't burn the calories

What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

What's green and has wheels? Dave Matthew's Band

How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him Food Stamps.

Why don't white people do the right thing? Because we suck

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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