So a gay guy walks in a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind, get out." The gay says he will drink in the corner. Later, a construction worker walks into the bar. He says," Man, I'm so thirsty I could drink the sweat off a cows balls." The gay guy in the corners says," Mooooooooo."

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Why was the construction worker crying? Because do to the failing economy, he was recently let go from his job, and he is mortified by the idea of being unable to find work and ending up homeless and unable to fend for his family.

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Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges don't talk

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You wanna hear a real joke? Well, look at the post below this one.

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why was the boy sad? his friend got hit by a bus.

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I asked my Grandma if she ever tried 69. And she said, “No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the sailors I could screw in one night.”

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Why is Jem no longer a cartoon? Because they all died from toxic hairspray.

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Guy: If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I would put I and u together. Girl: Really because if I could r-arrange the Alphabet I would put f and u together

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George Bush.

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Why did girl cry? Because she recently saw the messy demise of her parent's marriage.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one. He might have trouble focusing, but his ADHD in no way prevents him from completing such a task.

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What to you do when a monkey walks into your bar? Quietly escort it out and into the nearest zoo.

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black people. that is all...

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why didnt the mouse go for the cheese on the mouse trap it is proven that mice dont actually really like cheese all that much.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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Justin Bieber.

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Tim tebow is the anti christ

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You're mama's so ugly, she will most-likely never meet a compatible mate and die alone.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had just escaped from the slaughterhouse and ran for its life.

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A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

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A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replied, "That's probably because you're schizophrenic."

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Knock Knock Whose there? Lemons Lemons who? The fruit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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