Two giraffes walk into a bar, hit their heads, cracktheir skulls and die.

Why did billy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead

penis

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman notices this rather humorous cliche and proceeds to point it out, laughs are shared by all.

What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wow, I screwed up, Give me head.

Poop

Knock Know! Come in!

What happened to the guy who bought a nice, brand new, plasma screen t.v.? He hanged himself.

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin inside a blender.

Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

Why did the man's motorcycle not move when the street light turned green? Because it was a filing cabinet.

why was the carrot sad? it was stuck in an antelopes anus

How many licks does it take to get to center of a tootsie pop? pickles, 7:00 pm, wood, shoulder pain

How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head under water until water gets into her lungs and she cant breathe.

What starts with P and ends with ORN? POPCORN

What's the difference between a cult leader and a television personality? On average, 3.2 inches.

A man meets the girl of his dreams. Too bad the man will die in 3 days due to terminal cancer

How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? A: Pick him up and suck on his wang!

What happens if Chuck Norris meets a Transformer? Nothing. They would converse, then go their separate ways. Or Chuck would get killed. Horribly.

Q: Why did James cry? A: Because he's an infant and still quite afraid of his surroundings

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

what the difference between ET and polish people? ET is an alien and polish people are human

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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