your mothers so fat...... shes borderline diabetic.

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why didnt the man go to the wedding? he wasnt invited.

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knock knock. no one answered so the man at the door went home.

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Boob

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Whats the next Line? YAH YAH YAH YAH YAH....

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a boy jumps off a building why? because he's afraid of heights

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How do you get 4 Jews in a car? Open the door and tell them politely to get in.

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What does a black car thief do with a stolen car? Drive it

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Im a Tree... BARK BARK!!!

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Why did a boy fall off the swing at a playground? He did not have any arms.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Two tigers, walking down Oxford St. One turns to the other & says, "Quiet for a Saturday, don't you think?"

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What do you call a black man driving a helicopter? Blackhawk down

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what do mexicans and grass have in common You find them both in your front yard

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What's better than singing in the rain? Singing in a Pitt of fire. Oh wait that would be way worse than singing in the rain

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Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Meanwhile in the basement...an elderly man, who lives a lone and whose children lead their own lives and dont have much time for him, lies on the ground unable to move after having falling down the stairs. He has been there for 2 days. He is frightened and confused, he hears someone knocking and his hopes perk up, he tries to call but due to lack of water his mouths is too dry to do so. He sobs in frustration. Knock Knock [Silence] The old man cries, aware of his fate.

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Dear People who are reading this, I am seriously considering suicide. My Mom beats me and my Dad rapes me in the butthole until i bleed. I have no friends and the only way i get my nut off is if it is into a napkin. I often put peanutbutter on my ballsack and have my dog lick it off. It is the only time that i am happy. I have the gun to my head right now and if you wanna talk me out of it. I live in Lincoln, Nebraska. My number is (402)713-9565. Hurry before i run out of time...... and tears. Sincerely, Adam Claypool

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roses are red, violets are blue, I got pneumonia so now I am too

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dieing in a hole.

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Is that your face or is your dog walking backwards.

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A: Knock Knock B: ...

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Why couldn't Paul see. He got stabbed in the eye by two mexicans

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Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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