What's green and bounces? An envious kangaroo.

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A pterodactyl walks into a bar, bartender says "What'll you have." To which the pterodactyl graciously replies "RAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRR." Because pterodactyl's do not speak English.

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What looks like donuts but stinks of shit. Sean Big Macs socks

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Q: what do you call a drunk blond? A: a cab

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If it wasn't for my horse I'd never go to college.

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My friend Keith found a worm in his apple. He ate it anyways

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A man walks into a bar and sees an attractive blonde. He is afraid of talking to her so he goes home and masterbates himself to sleep.

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An Icelandic boy hangs himself because of peer pressure. His family mourns for their loss

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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The big male boar went out the forest, saw a group of women and start to swank.

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Which hockey player has scored the monst goals of all time? He-Shoot-Si Scores

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Why did the housewife become a farmer? Because the kitchen was burned down in a horrific accident.

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What happens when a chemist dies? They are given a proper funeral and buried.

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What is it called when a whole bunch of black people run down a hill? A race.

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My friends told me they found a dead women....they said they pissed on her........that was my mom

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What did Steven Hawking get for Christmas? ------ ------ ------ A bike.

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so a square said to another square,your rather obtuse oh wait squares cant talk,whats going on. later that day,chuckles realizes he isnt funny -chuckles

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Two men are in a bar. One of them turns to the other one and says, "I've slept with your mom." The other one replies "Go home dad you're drunk."

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People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout. Heavy rain came down and killed him.

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What's black on bottom and white on top?? Society

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

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What did the snowman put on his head? Nothing; snowmen are inanimate.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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