A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happpens when a Jew walks into a wall with a boner? He breaks his nose

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q. How did the blind man survive from walking of a cliff? A. He didn't he died

thumb_up thumb_down -2

knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What Do You Call a Hawk in Virginia? A Hawk What Do you Call a Hawk that lives in Virginia? Virgian Hawk

thumb_up thumb_down -2

how do you spend all your money you go buy stuff

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A priest was driving a motorcycle and was doing these amazing crazy stunts. It turns out they were actually filming a movie.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Christopher Reeves walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a sociopathic murderer.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

thumb_up thumb_down -2

When is it okay for priests to touch underage boys? Ash Wednesday, they have place ash using their hands on the boys foreheads.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had several drinks, conversed animatedly, and heartily enjoyed themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Jehovah's Witness." "Jehovah's witness, who?" "Just Jehovah's Witness. Your doorbell is not working."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A priest and a rabii walk into a bar. Both men, despite both being good people and well respected in their communities, aren't able to overcome their differences which are signified by their religions. Both men later leave the bar and surround themselves with people of their own kin.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?? Theres one less drunk.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A banker makes some poor economic investments with other people's money. turns out the people can never get the money back. the banker walks away like nothing happened. the government does nothing to prosecute the man. Somewhere in there his wife leaves him.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's read, round and gets smaller? A baby combing its hair with a potato pearler

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the black man buy watermellon? Because he was having a barbecue in his suburban neighborhood and he wanted some fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than finding a holocost in your apple. A truck full of dead babies then what's worse than finding a truck full of dead babies in your apple. Braving to pich fork them out

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was Sally gone for her father's birthday? She went on a camping trip with her friends. Sally's friends were brutally murdered and she was kidnapped. The kidnapper cut off her arms and legs and left her in the middle of a suburban intersection late at night. The autopsy revealed that Sally died from blood loss from losing her limbs. It also revealed that she had contracted a fast growing tumor in her brain which would have most likely killed her within days of the murder anyway. Her family was living in the country illegally so her DNA did not reveal a computer file of her person. Her parents were not informed of her death for years because of this. When it was determined that the victim was the parents' daughter they were arrested for living in the country illegally and were not able to have a funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

your mommas so fat because she has diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops