why did the chicken cross the road? because it could not afford sandals.

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What did the duck get for Christmas. A potato. Not really it got nothing because it's a duck

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A patient goes to the doctor. The doctor says I have bad news and even worse news. The patient says "What's the bad news?" The doctor says "You only have 24 hours to live." The patient says "Oh my gosh what could possibly be worse than that?!" The doctor says "Well...we've been trying to contact you since yesterday..."

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Knock knock Who's this? Your neighbor Yes can I help you? Hi, I'm new around here, can you help me find the closest gas station? Turn right over there pass 2 traffic lights it will be on your left Okay, thank you You're welcome

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What did the black man say to the asian? Hey.

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PLEASE LIKE TO DONATE 50 CENTS TO MY CHARIDY .... SAVE THE PENGUINS IN AFRICA -BY LUKE BRANIFF

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What do you call a man who buys flowers, chocolates, and new jewelry for his wife? A kind, considerate husband.

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Knock knock whos there? Underware Underware who? I underware my friends are

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Roses are red violets are blue I think you re stupid go eat a shoe

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A man walks into a bar and asks for 6 vodka shots. The bartender looks at him in a strange manner. The man quickly downs all 6 of the vodka shots. The bartender looks at the man and says "Jeepers mate, whats the celebration?" The man replies "Well mate, first blow job today" The bartender in a kind gesture says "Here you go mate, next one is one me" while pouring another shot. The man respectfully replies, "No thanks mate, if 6 didn't get the taste away, im sure 7 won't"

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I walked into my sister's room and slipped on a bra..........it was a boobie trap

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There was once a boy named Swan, But then they built Autobahn.

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

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Who has a big nose? YOU!!!

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The entire population.

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How do u know that your obese ? People stare at you

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Why was the dwarf nicknamed The Anaconda? Because everybody loves a bit of irony.

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What didnt rebecca black do today ride the bus

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The dewey decimal system

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What's worse than a shotgoun to the balls? Nothing.

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why did the women cross the road? she didnt, theres no road in the kitchen.

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what do dead babies and turkeys have in common? you eat them on ocasions

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Two black men and a latino board a plane together. They are members of the Marshall High School football team, and all die in the subsequent crash.

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yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops