In the weeks following the original release of Die Hard, reports sprung up across the nation of impressionable boys overdosing while masturbating.

A girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

can't you hear that TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT, TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT flute (nicki minaj in a past life listening to a symphony)

Did you know, even though penguins ARE birds... They don't live in volcanoes?

why was 6 afraid of 7 He raped him the other day

Wat do u call black circus clwon a bad comedian

whats the only concert you can get into for 45 cents? a 50 cent concert featuring Nickelback

Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

Why did the man suck at basketball? Because he is white, 5 foot 2, and has no arms. Posted By: Lram

How did the chicken know where he was going? He had a map.

What happens if Chuck Norris meets a Transformer? Nothing. They would converse, then go their separate ways. Or Chuck would get killed. Horribly.

A man who was not blind, but could not see, walks around a metal bar, and proceeds to the bar, where he walks into the door without opening it first

How much money did the pirate pay for his ear to get pierced? Nothing, given that he is a pirate. It was probably done at gunpoint.

The ULTIMATE Street Fighter shotokan safety guide one Turbo masters tournament X Revenge Kombat Super Ultimate Alpha Omega F*** Y** Edition! 1. I case an attack breaks both your legs, use your last remaining strength in order to kick the air with one leg, while keeping the other one straight down, then immediatedly yell MYLEGSARBROKEN! In order to receive medical attention. And please remember: If Hadou can, then you Sure can! 2. DLC ONLY 3 DLC ONLY 4. DLC Only. ...hayball rolls trough... 9001: DLC only

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

How many times can the Frenchman cheat on his wife? I don't know.

Why did the chicken cross the street? To get to your house. Knock Knock Who is there. The chicken.

No deal, blind trust and I help you, or no friendship, and certainly no reason to help you.

i ate and i ate and i was sick on the floor 8x8=64

What happened to the kid who couldn't swim? He drowned.

At the time my grandfather came round to visit, what was happening in Australia? A giant spider was giving birth.

You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

seven guys rob a bank, they share it in this ratio 2:2:2:4:2:5:2 who got the most money? you don't know

what does the homeless man do when he gets home? nothing, he's homeless

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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