How many Jews died in the Holocaust? Not enough.

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How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

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Q: Whats worse than 17 babies in 1 bin. A: 1 baby in 17 bins. Q: Whats worse than that. A: 17 bins in 1 baby.

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A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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Yo mama is so fat, so when she jumped of a building, she died.

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why did tom get HIV? He was raped by a giant scorpion

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Your mama is so fat that when she walks her legs rub against each other

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Yo mama so fat she sells shade. Yo mama so fat she needs cheat codes for wii fit. Yo mama so fat she in call of duty when a player kills her they get a 5 person kill streak. Yo mama so fat that she is fat. :)

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You wanna hear a real joke? Well, look at the post below this one.

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I'm hungry.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

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A blonde, brunette, and a red head were walking on the side of the road and a fridge landed on them and they died. At least they still could go to their funerals.

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Who gave Max head georgia Hidi

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was tied to the chicken

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Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

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What's the difference between George W Bush and a doorknob? George W Bush is the president of the United States. A doorknob is a mechanical device that securely closes a hinged door, thereby keeping your family safe from danger.

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Why was the construction worker crying? Because do to the failing economy, he was recently let go from his job, and he is mortified by the idea of being unable to find work and ending up homeless and unable to fend for his family.

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3 jews walk into a bar I lied it was a gas chamber

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Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

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What do you say to a man, who calls you 3 AM? - "Hello!"

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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