Why did the baby cross the road? It was tied to the chicken

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Simon says; "You're adopted."

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My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

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Q: what did the tractor say when helost his farmer? A: wheres my farmer?

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what sucks? things that suck

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Comfortably, four.

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What's the difference between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee? Bruce Lee's dead.

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My dad went into Home Depot, he went in to get garage door part, he took an hour and came back out with three things.

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Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

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Why Do Black Men Like Koolaid Because its red

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The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

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So theres a priest, a rabbi, and an athiest on a cliff. They all remark at the beautiful view and take plenty of pictures with their respected families.

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Sheesh people! Stop insulting my last comment! Do not GO into my comment section, I do not WANT YOU to keep thumbing up those that call me pedo. Moral: Norway... you gonna call us all pedophiles? Please... besides I prefer them over nineteen... the downside is that they often got a couple of kids already at that age... Sigh...

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What do you get when you put a dog in a cage. Cantaloupes

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Why did my cat die? I drowned it in the bath.

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What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing. Hitler died many years ago now and he was in no position of power during Bin Laden's reign of terror due to the fact that he was already dead. Therefore it is impossible that they could have had any sort of conversation. But now Bin Laden is dead as well. HIGH FIVE!!!!!!!

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What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

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How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

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A man walks into a restaurant and orders a rare steak. Soon after, he gets food poisoning.

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Why was the lady fat. She ate a lot of food.

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What did Scooby Doo say to Shaggy? Raggy

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What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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