jack and jill climbed up the hill but they were bagels

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Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he had poor coordination.

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What's black can run really fast and jump really high? A panther

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Q: What do you get when you cross an Elephant and a Rhinoceros? A: Merriam-Webster defines "cross" as "an affliction that tries one's virtue, steadfastness, or patience." This comedic exercise is one such affliction.

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Did the single mother survive the plane crash? No.

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Text me back when you can. I can't, my fingers got amputated.

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What does tupperware and a walrus have in common? they both like a tight seal

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whats worse than 2 people dying? 3 people dying.

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket.

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Wy did the man fall? A tree fell on his legs!

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What did the blind orphan get for christmas? Cancer

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lets have sex, ok, but itll have to be anal, cuz im a guy xoxox danni

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Someone stopped playing Skyrim.

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this kid named terry stockton lives in craig beach ohio is gay

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An atheist and a priest agree to a public debate. The priest doesn't make much of an attempt to argue because there is a young boy in his podium giving him a handjob.

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You are being like super pervert now, I would never ever even try weed, cocaine is the real deal, you know I do not mean that. Anyway does it work on everyone?

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple Not blue

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How come anti jokes r funny

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whats worse than 911 nothing you cant beat 911that sucked

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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Why is Michael J. Fox unable to build domino chains? He only has one domino.

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amy baked 35 sugar cookies and ate 25, what does she have now? diabetes.

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Roses are red violets are blue I think you re stupid go eat a shoe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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