What happens when a guy walk into a school and shoots kids? Oh sorry, to soon?

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Two guys walk into a bar. One man walks out of the bar at a similiar time.

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What's the difference between a bench and a Mexican? The bench can support a family.

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what do you call a guy called Bill? Bill

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Why did the kid eat so much ice cream? Because he wanted to eat ice cream.

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Guess What! HI!

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What did the man say after being hit by a bus? Nothing he is now dead.

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What's worse than no christmas? Taking a chainsaw to the face.

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What is blue and flies across the room? A baby with a punctured lung.

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What do you call Bilbo Baggins when you use him for pleasure? Dildo Baggins

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Why did the Dentist recommend Oral B? He had been paid by the company and thus legally bound to do so.

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Knock Knock. Whose there. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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What is the difference between a black man and a Chevrolet? They didn't sell Chevrolets in the 1800s.

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PISS OUT MY ASS!!!!!

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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whats worse than having your sextape leaked to the media? not being a kardashian when it happens.

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What has wings and can't fly? What has legs and can't move? What has mouth and can't eat? A dead bird on the road

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book 'em danno

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What did Tim say about his wife cheating on him with his best friend's wife? He ran to R Kelly and got peed on.

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How do you find out how many Mexicans are living in the United States? Take a Census.

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Your mother is so stupid she couldn't get a passing score on a standardized test.

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Cancer

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on the trampoline

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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