What's green and looks like a red apple? A green apple

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The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

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Guy 1: Hey, do you like fish sticks? Guy2: Yeah. Guy 1: Me too

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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Wats rong with yo leg.....

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why was it funny that the boy got a razor for christmas because he had leukemia

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this is not an anti joke

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How do you make a blond shut up? Staple her tongue to the roof of her mouth and super-glue her lips together.

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Knock knock.. Whos there? To... To who? To whom.

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A handicapp walks into a bar

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whats long and green? weed

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Q: why does the fire breather hate his job A: his parents were burned to death MR

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What did the sheep say when he broke a leg? Nothing, sheeps can't talk.

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Why did Charlotte fall off the swing? She got hit in the face with an axe.

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Why was the man full? He ate a meal.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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Why did the dog eat poop?

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WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

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Why did the black girl and white guy have sex? Because they were both sexually attracted to each other.

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Why did the Jew run across the road? To get to the other side.

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Morning wood.

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whats green and falls from trees, pool tables.

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Knock Knock Not Yet

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What's sad about 4 people in a Lamborgini going over a cliff? It was my car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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