So a bunch of blondes are in a group and a murder comes by and sais, "if you want to live, answer a question right." so the blondes pick there smartest on. the first question is, what is 9+4... the blonde answers five, the crowd goes "give her another chance giver her another chance, same thing happens, she gets it wrong and the crowd goes "give her another chance, give her another chance." the murderer sais "ok fine this is your final guess, what is 2+2" the blonde goes "uuhhhhhh... 4?" And the whole crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance

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There is a young boy called Clive, and his dad asks him what he wants for his birthday: "I would like one yellow golf ball please dad" he said. Of course, his father was quite surprised by his son's request, but nevertheless, he got him a yellow golf ball for his birthday. A few years later, clive does amazingly well at school and gets all As in his final exams. Filled with pride and love for his son, his father says to him: "I can't begin to tell you how proud i am of you, Clive. In fact, you can have a preasant! What do you want?" Clive thinks for a moment. "i would like one hundred yellow golf balls please!" His father was a bit annoyed at his strange request, but neverrtheless, gave Clive his yellow golf balls. A few years later, Clive wins the gold medal at the olymics for the 100m sprint. His father is very proud: "Son, i am so happy about the way you've turned out. You make me so proud. Is there anything you want me to do for you?" "can i have 1000 yellow golf balls please" Now his father got annoyed, he thought Clive was taking the piss. Eventually though, he calmed down and got clove the golf balls. Unfortunatley, Clive gets diagnosed with a deadly disease. His father is heartbroken. And as clive is lying on the hospital bed, his father moves close and speaks to him. "Son" he said, tears welling up in his eyes, "I just want to ask you one thing." "Ok," Clive said, as he too started to get emotional. "Why on earth did you want all those golf balls?" Clive looked deep into his father's eyes, as he took his last breath said: "I wanted them because- ack -splutter- ack" And he died.

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to get to the other side.

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why did justin fuck alice and maliyah to have fun

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Why was the boy dad? Because he was taken advantage of by an older woman during ovulation and impregnated her.

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They promptly order their drinks and then leave.

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She said no

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What's big,long,and mostly men use it? A submarine

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what did the mom with cancer get for christmas? radiation poisoning

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What did the farmer say when he lost his cow? Where's my wife?

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A woman wearing a very fancy, striped sweater walks into a bar and sits down. The bar tender asks her “what’ll it be”?. The girl replies “Just a beer for me”. As this happens a child in Africa dies from complications due to starvation.

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A homosexual walks into a church

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Whats worst then listening to you girl friends problems? Nothing.

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Q: Whats red and circular? A: A red circle

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'll order The Special, what's wrong with you?

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Why did the fish cross the road? Because fish don't have legs and can't walk anywhere

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they're purple That's why they're called "violets"

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why did the cute baby start crying?? because its feet were eaten by rats.

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your mamas so fat her weight is 3.14 without the decimal

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Why was the mom crying? Her son was found in the oven.

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What did my wife say when I asked her to pick up some milk on her way home from work? OK

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How do you keep an idiot busy? Why would you wanna keep an idiot busy, it's not gonna make a difference...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because 2.5 million children in the world are suffering from HIV/AIDs.

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why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a date-rapist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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