What happens when you shoot a giraffe? It dies.

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Question: How did the chicken get to the other side of the road? Answer: Too find his joint.

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Why were you at a funeral? Someone died.

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How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

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A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

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mary had a little lamb its fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went this joke has no punchline

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Bumsniffer

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knock knock Who's there? The repo man Why? You're being evicted

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Why did the guy with alzheimer's say to his wife? He can't remember.

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"I think your a hoe" "Don't worry, I know I am!" "You wanna F*** me?" "Hell Ya!"

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your dads so fat, he makes your mom look skinny.

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Why can't a black guy be the King of England? He's not in line for it.

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What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

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knock knock who's there doctor doctor who No

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Chuck Noris

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Whats worse then getting stabbed in the trachea by a aids infected knife? getting pounded anally by satan

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Why couldn't the black kid buy a bike? He had no money.

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What happens when you cross an Asian with a bass guitar? An Asian man lies down diagonally across a bass guitar.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you cuz your fat.

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Why wasn't the man hungry? Because he just ate a thousand almonds.

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What did your mom say after she went sky diving? Nothing, her parachute didn't open

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You wanna hear a joke about my penis Nevermind, it would be inappropriate of me to say such a thing.

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What did Delaware? A coat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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