What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

How do you kill a 1000 Ethiopians? Throw a biscuit off a cliff. JimBoto

If a rooster lays a brown egg on the south side of an Asian man's roof, which way would I turn at the intersection? Folderol, because laundry has no soul.

What's the difference between mustangs and dead babies I don't collect mustangs

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

69

What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

Kill me? Lol, come get me sis, I can kill you wit my mullet, nobody wants to take my phone, but your sister already replied to my "anna fuck" with "arent you married buddy? :)" yeah a smiley, ill show you! The doors are open, if I fail to take you out, I am not deserving of living futher, course yea mother blusx to everywown, I mean she is horny all the tiem! Anywaz, hurry up, im out of stims so im fallin sleeps, told ur sis to send me a nude pic, rite now... so this mite take 3 minuts. Hey, watch the next pic im gonna send you, that should motivate you to fight me sersly, i men sure im slo, but imma sp ful ov valeium dat i feel nor feear no pain... never feeer pain so whateves... Nah your sis is skinny, thats not here, the pixture is fakye, for now... u dyou know dat she keeps snending them hearte and smile and even a smilei with a rose, thats FLIRIIIIIING! Flirting, anyway you get the picture, but I wont respon anymor becuz i am shuttin down this pc and gonna dream abot the things to0 you sis. ;)

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

when the doctor asked him why he was sad andreas replyd i have a small penis and drew and devin keep making me drop the soap

I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

What did Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobile? -Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile!

Roses Are Red Violets are blue A face like yours belong in a zoo Don't worry ill be there too Not in the cage but laughing at you

Joe Paterno dosn't walk into a police station.-South Park

Yo mamas so fat, that I need a new pair of sunglasses.

Roses are red, However, they can also be other colours, such as white, pink or yellow.

There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

A man opens his refrigerator and takes out a can of soda. He returns back to his living area and continues watching television.

A baby seal walks into a club.

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

Apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...