Ok, so, a big moose walks into a store and he looks around for potatoes but he cant find any. So he asked a worker, "do you know where the potatoes are?" and she says, "the potatoes are in aisle 3." So the moose goes to aisle 3 and there aren't any potatoes!

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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why was the little girl afraid of the dark because she was brutally raped in the dark when she was 4.

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What do get when you cross a truck and a cliff? Flames.

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The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

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Q. What do you call a bunch of guys in a shower? A. The Holocaust.

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What did the senile man say to the kids on his lawn? Tree dance the gator thong for my nipples.

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Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

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Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

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Why did the moron jump through the window?

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No, he hasn't either

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

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What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

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What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

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What happened when the asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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Doctor, people always laught at me at work! :( What do you do for a living? I am a comedian...

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ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

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What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

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Why did Billy fall off the swings? Because he had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops