What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was a Women

My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

Ok, so, a big moose walks into a store and he looks around for potatoes but he cant find any. So he asked a worker, "do you know where the potatoes are?" and she says, "the potatoes are in aisle 3." So the moose goes to aisle 3 and there aren't any potatoes!

roses are red violets are blue your baby has down syndrome

Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

What do you call an Arab flying a plane over New York? The Pilot.

Jews...

why was the little girl afraid of the dark because she was brutally raped in the dark when she was 4.

Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

why did the girl cross the road ? to get run over by a flee of running cows

A man called his dentist and asked when he should make an appointment. The dentist told him to come in around two thirty pm because that's when the next appointment was available.

Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

knock knock who's there? bell bell who? bellend

2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

one day a grape was in the sun raisin

what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

The King stands next to a pole. The King goes away, the pole stays there.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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