What did the Johhny say to the black man when he saw him buying a watermelon? Nothing, Johnny is mute.

There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour. Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry." "No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away." "I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."

Q:What's similar between a squirel and a eagle? A:Both have wings, exept for the squirrel.

So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

What's black and white and red all over? Two biracial gay guys boning a can of paint...

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your worst nightmare!! Ohh.... Do come in it's raining outside.

A convict is ripping out stop signs .. and a police comes out of no where and screams "What are you doing?!" The guys says Ripping up stop signs..

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the slaughterhouse was on the other side.

EVERYONE NEEDS TO UNDERSTAND!! DYSLEXICS ARE TEOPLE POO!

An English ship lands in the New World and offers to trade with the natives. The ship actually carried foreign diseases that the natives had no immunity to, and they all died.

what is the difference between a bucket of shit and a black person? the bucket the bucket

What's black and red? I black guy bleeding to death

You: What gets wetter and wetter the more it dries? Person: A towel?! You: No, an aquaphilian woman drying off a car ;)

so...um, yeah

whats worse then the worst thing that happened in your life? nothing.

You know what's funny? Lot's of things.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he

What starts with f and end in uck Firetruck

Why did Suzy have burns on her face? Because her little brother attacked her with a hot curling iron thinking it was a lightsaber.

Why did the little boy drop his Ice cream? He had no arms(:

Three men walk into a Bar.... You'd have thought at least one of them would have seen it !

Q. How do you know when you've had too much too drink? A. Your dead(No because when your dead you can't think.)

What do you call a lubia chin jew slave?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...