Q: What is green, blue, white and red? A: They're colors

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How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

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Lets go Yankees

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ram My Penis Into Ram My Penis Into Who? Me.

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Q: what happens when you throw a red rock into a blue lake? A: a splash.

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What did the cat say when it stepped in poo? Meow.

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Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away. Martin was a lonely man

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How did Helen Keller burn her hands? On a candle.

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welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? statutory rape

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A man and his friend go hunting,one falls in a hole and appears dead. The friend calls 911 and asks what to do, the operator says ok first we need to make sure he's dead. The friend checks his pulse and finds out he is living, then an ambulance is sent and the hunter lives with minor injuries.

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Knock knock *No one was home*

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2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

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What's Worse then an apple with a worm? The holocaust

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Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

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What's worse than 100 babies tied to a tree. 1 baby tied to 100 trees

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Where did Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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How are eagles and jellyfish the same? They both fly but jellyfish don't.

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yo mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the size of the door...

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What do you call a strait man that is also gay? Bisexual.

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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Two drunk men were in a bar fight, they smashed beer bottles on each others heads and walked away because it hurt.

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HARRY EFFING STYLES

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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