What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

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Whats black and white and says moo? A Dalmatian retriever with a voice box.

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how do you make holy water? you burn the hell out of it

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Why do people laugh at anti-jokes? Because of a chemical reaction to a neurological phenomenon that results from the brain's response to external stimuli.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing Jenga on September 11th.

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Why did the black man go to the store? To get milk and eggs because he was running out of those items

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what do you get when you cross a turkey with a goat? nothing you can't cross to genetically different spieces stupid

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What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

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Q. what is the most amazing animal in the world? A. MULLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

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-Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Willis. -Wills who? -IT'S ME WILLIS. YOUR SON! -Whatchu talking bout Willis, I ain't got no son. -Remember Bill, my father? I was conceived on your 20th birthday party. .... - Is he fat white Bill, Mexican Bill, or Billette the shemale? And thus, poor Willis jumps off a bridge, committing suicide, because his biological mother turns out to be a shemale screwing whore.

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If life gives you lemons, squeeze it in life' s eyes.

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whats the difference between a pair of shoes, and a computer. alot.

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i just got all five seasons of big bang theory in the mail for xmas... i'm divorcing my wife.

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when the teacher asked jimmy if he was a girl jimmy felt very scared because his teacher had no mental problems.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

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how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

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What is the Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything? 43 - 1 = ?

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What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

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Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

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How do you hurt a clown? shoot it.

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What other than water contains H2O? The condensation reaction between two alpha glucose molecules to form Maltose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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