Today, I was thirsty so I got in my kitchen and took a bottle of juice out of my refrigirator, I realised the bottle was empty, so I immediatly took a walk to the store and bought another bottle.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I was about to do an triathlon, but i took an arrow to the knee. It got infected and i promptly died two days later.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

When life gives you lemons, find someone with a papercut.

thumb_up thumb_down

-Knock Knock - no one respond , they were brutally murdered by a drug addict.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Agricultural production fell significantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, 'at least it shall be over quickly.'

thumb_up thumb_down -33

This blind man read my mind the other day. I swear, it's like he has a 5th sense!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call four friends spending a wild night in Las Vegas that they can't rember the next day? A rip off of the Hangover

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the slaughter-house.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Bill Gates, Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk die and find themselves standing before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. Actually, that's just speculation. No one really knows what happens when you die. Most likely your consciousness simply stops, and you cease to exist, an eternity of oblivion. But most people can't face this possibility so we have made up comforting stories to attempt to ease our collective fear of death.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion getting raped by 2 giant scorpions

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's wrong the a man who can't tell where he is, can't tell where he's going, and doesn't know how to use a map? Downs Syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you make a clown shut up? Throw a axe at it!!

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Why was six afraid of seven? Because your a fag.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's sad about a black guy driving up a hill in a car? It's yor car

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuse 7 was a convicted serial killer. >----->

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A man walks into a bar. He leaves the bar slightly intoxicated.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What came first the chicken or the egg? The chicken god made two of every animal

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What ended in the year 1970? 1969

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops