What did Chuck Norris say when he stubbed his toe? "Oh shit I stubbed my toe."

When u r using ur computer and then all the sudden it says reload and something about an error blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah .. ......blah blah blah. Blah blah. Your response: "AWWWWW BITCH ASS FUCK U"......*LEAVES ROOM*..... (HOUR LATER)*COMES BACK IN THE ROOM* "Oh hey, Meet my bff she is from your version of Hell her name is , Vir-is (virus) anyways Vir-is wanted to have sex with u and probably give u a USB Transmitted Disease A.K.A. virus then wwhile u r rebooting Vir-is and I is gonna kill u Toodles

Why did the chicken cross the road? because potatos are invading russia

A shark walks into a bar and the bartender says Why the bloody face? The shark replies by saying my wife beat me with a stick. Considering that sharks cant talk, the bartender ends up going to the doctor to see if he may be dillousinal.

why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken so it will wonder when not properly fenced in

Doctor, Doctor, I feel like I don't know anyone... Uh...who are you?

what's green and has wheels? grass, i lied about the wheels.

How do you shock thomas eddison? Attatch his kite to his balls.

7

What is worse than when the Titanic sunk? You Cannot say. You were on that ship.

you know why they're called ear wigs, right? cause they go in your ears! then they wig out? no, they kill you.

Q: How do you scream at a purple? A: Black people

What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

a tiger swims into the indian ocen and eats a tuna. the tiger shortly dies

Person 1: What did the narwhal say to the other narwhal. Person 2: I don't know... What? Person 1: How am I supposed to know? Shortly after a serious argument breaks out.

A mouse sniffed a peice of cheese. It was on a mouse trap and then it died in the trap.

A bartender walks into the man and the bar said nothing because it was inanimate.

Whats better than giving birth to a disabled son? A Blowjob

XD I must like, really be into you, God I cannot breathe XD, that is like the most disgusting thing I have heard in my life, but coming from you that just comes out so quaint! XD

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? Hoefuwpugosihfioapfsoihosw[

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its babies were being mauled by a cat.

What do you get when you cross a Fish and a Duck? A Dish

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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