What's the easiest way to kill a blond? You stab her.

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What do you look for in a woman? a pulse.

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a horse walkes into a bar... never mind that's just Sarah Jessica Parker

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What's the difference between my father and my mother. My father isn't an alcoholic

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How many policemen does it take to change a lightbulb? None they just beat up the room for being black

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[INSERT ANTIJOKE HERE]

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Cigarettes are a lot like hamsters. Perfectly harmless until you put them in your mouth and catch them on fire.

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

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What do you give a man who has everything? Syphilis

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What did the engineer say to the supervisor? Hi.

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A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

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A guy walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because he is only 19 years old.

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A coach walks into the team dressing room at halftime; his team is down 42-0. He screams at the players, "You guys are playing like a bunch of grannies. No offense"

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What would people call Michael Jackson if he became president? Probably President Jackson

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A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

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What did the blind, deaf, and dumb child get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Q: A jew and asian and a normal white guy walk into a resturan, who orders the cheapest meal. A: the Asian, its 1940 and the jews dead

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Roeses Are Red Violets Are Blue He's The One For Me And Not For You, And If You Try To Take My Place I Will Take My Fist And Smash Your Face(:

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What is 5 brittish guys who can't sing and horrible music make .... one direction

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

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How do you make a baby fly? Hit it's mother in the stomach.

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What do you call a doctor without a head? Deceased

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What's Funny About A Black Man Being Shot? Nothing, That Man Was My Friend.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops