Bigfoot, Santa, a dumb blonde, and a smart blonde all jump off of a cliff. They all reach terminal velocity and at impact at the same time. However, no one really cares.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because a tree fell on her. Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally...

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What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

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What did batman do before getting into his batmobile? - Look for the keys.

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What did the father give to his son with terminal cancer for his 5th birthday? Nothing the kids going to die anyway

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Does an Anti-Joke need to have an ironic punch line? ...

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Say this fast: Alpha kenny body sofa king hard with mike hawk. :)

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if quiz is quizzal whats test?

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where does someone with one leg work? -no where this is a recession

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Why did the kid trip over the rock? Because he was diagnosed with serious autism, and might die soon.

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whats worse than 911 nothing you cant beat 911that sucked

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know... I thought no one knew the answer to that question...

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I made a friend today. His name is don. He poops burritos. I like burritos.

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What did the cool guy say to Kelly Clarkson? Nothing, she's fat.

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q

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A man walks into a store and says "Roses are red, Violets are blue, there is a bomb strapped to my chest, give me all the money"

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Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

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A man walking on a beach looks into the surf and sees a beautiful oil lamp floating to shore. Wondering who in the heck uses oil lamps anymore, he picks it up, sees a bit of crust on the side, and rubs it clean. Just then a burst of smoke comes out of the lamp, and a genie floats out and stands before the man. "Oh master, thank you for releasing me from the lamp. In thanks, I grant to you one wish. Anything you ask for, it will be true," said the genie. "One wish? What happened to three," asked the man. "Dude, don't push it. We're in a recession. So what's your wish?" "OK. OK. I ... I... I WISH I WAS RICH!" screamed the man. The genie folded his arms, blinked twice, scratched his nose, nodded his head, and spun in a circle twice. "And it is SO!" he cried out. The man looked at himself, looked at the genie, but nothing seemed to have changed. "WTF, genie. Am I rich?" The genie replied, "Well no. You said, 'I wish I was rich.' I made you rich... ten years ago. You were rich. Now you're not. You used the indicative mood 'was.' If you wanted it to become true now in the present, you should have used the subjunctive mood 'were.'"

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Why didn't the boy respond to the text? His phone had run out of charge.

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I have two hands. Some people dont.

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What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

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What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Easter? Hepatitis.

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knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

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you: have you seen the movie constapated them:no you:its because it hasen't come out yet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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