Bumper Sticker: I Brake for Stop Signs

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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who can jump higher than mount everest? anyone. mount everest cant jump

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A horse walks into a bar. He ordered some fries.

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Why didn't the monkey cross the road? He saw the chicken get run over.

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Inbreeding is no laughing matter but damn is it funny.

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Me: f*** off Asshole: YOU'RE MOM! Me: -is dead.

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A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

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Why was the black man forced off of the roller coaster He had heart disease

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a sausage maker buys a box of cereal

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

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Your momma so stupid, she dropped out of school at a young age of 12.

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why did the Mexican fall and not the black man. i don't know, go ask the Asian.

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What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

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Knock knock Who's there? Amy winehouse Amy winehouse who? Amy winehouse died by falling down a flight of stairs.

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A man enters a bar. Two minutes later, a woman leaves a bar. What happened? A man entered a bar and a woman left. What's there to explain?

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What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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A man walks into the market. He asks a young attractive employee in a smooth voice, "Do you have any honey here, baby?" The employee responds, "No sir. I'm sorry."

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Libyans stage a protest. They get massacred.

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How do you fit 6000000 jews into a car? 1 in the front, 1 in the back and the rest in the ashtray.

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How many pancakes does it take to lift up a dog house? Silly goose, alligators can't fly!

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Your mama is so fat she has a high BMI and is at a high-risk of Type II Diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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