Two polar bears are sitting in a hot tub. One polar bear asks the other to pass the soap. The other responds, "No soap, radio!"

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme oo

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What looks like a lion, sounds like a lion, and feels like a lion? A lion Ba dum chh

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Women's rights.

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What's worse than a dead baby falling out of a tree? Two dead babies stapled together falling out of a tree.

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Q. How many puns does it take to make a cup of tea? A. None. A pun is a grammatical construct and as such is incapable of combining the ingredients necessary to generate a hot drink which has been popular for hundreds of years.

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Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

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What's black and hangs from a rope on a tree in my backyard? A tire swing.

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whats orange, green and has a treadmill attached to it? a cantaloupe, i lied about the treadmill.

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A man and Sasquatch are walking down the shoreline on the eastern coast, the man looks back at the foot prints in the sand, he notices that during the hardest parts of his life, there were only one pair of footprints, while in his easiest moments, he sees two pairs of footprints; the man is disturbed about this and he asks Sasquatch this. "Sasquatch, Although you have always promised to be with me in my life, I see that when I needed you most, you were never there. Why is this Sasquatch?" Sasquatch replies, "HREAAHAHG?!"

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What did my grandma tell me during a funeral? Nothing. It's her funeral. She's dead.

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Why did Sally fall off the swingset? She had no arms. Knock ,Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the old lady have a heart attack? She got raped by a giraffe.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? HIV

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Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and suffered from a self-inflicted gunshot wound in his head, he is being treated by medical professionals

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Why does my friend pick up garbage? Because he is a garbageman.

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How do you stop a rhino from charging? Kill it

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children burning

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what's worse than the holocaust living jews

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Who you gonna call? Gobstoppers

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Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

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Yo momma is so average, she has to maintain her own facebook account...

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Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* *Busts open door* "Oh right... I killed Bob last week.

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Who's black, white and Asian at the same time? A panda.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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