A black man walks into a bar holding a weapon. He is asked to leave to leave because weapons are not allowed in the bar.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? You shouldn't call him anything. He needs help. -Tag

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Here is the worst joke ever. ..... Dislike this and you are awesome!! P.S. I'm serious. I want to make a joke with the MOST DISLIKES ever! Don't think this is reverse psychology. I don't do that shi*t.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion.

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Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

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A Fish walks into a bar. It died of oxygen starvation.

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What do an owl and a squirrel have in common? They can both fly! Except for the squirrel.

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How do you wake up Lady GAGA? A sludge hammer!

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

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What do you call a police woman who shaves her pubes? PC Marion Jones

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What do you get when you cross a fan with a child? A mess that you now have to clean up.

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So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

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How do you kill an already dead man? You don't he's already dead.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

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whay did the monkey fall out of the tree? he was dead. why did the cat fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm Helen Keller.

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Why couldn't the man walk? Because his leg is broken.

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What do you call a orphan with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Scrood

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why was the woman out of the kitchen, because she had to have sex with her husband in a bed

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Why did the blond wreak her car? She stayed up a very long time studying for her mid-term exam, And therefore, was not as attentive to the flow of traffic.

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Why did Billy get a 102% on his Algebra test? He got all of the questions correct including the bonus question. Oh, and he slept with the teacher.

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What did the African Man get in Africa Aids

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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